ATTENTION: Wayne LaPierre, Executive Vice President and CEO
FROM: Wayne Nobes, Freelance Copywriter
DATE: July 4th, 2017
RE: The NRA Freedom’s Safest Place Ad – “The Violence of Lies”
Dear Mr. LaPierre,
As a highly accomplished American copywriter who loves our great country and everyone in it – including those “yellow-bellied, anti-gun liberals” – I feel duty-bound to urgently issue you with an all-American critique of the NRA “Freedom’s Safest Place| S2 E2” Ad.
First, allow me to sincerely commend its exquisite craftsmanship. It hits bulls-eye on every target within its sights. From the gut-wrenchingly impactful script to the dramatically arranged visuals, the action-packed projectile delivers one of the mightiest marketing bangs I have experienced in a long time. And whoever chose Dana Loesch as a spokeswoman for your organization deserves a big shiny medal. Her celebrity and authority sure kicks butt like nobody else can.
That said, I must alert you to the fact that, even though this highly memorable Ad completely lives up to most of the NRA’s exceptionally high standards, it sadly displays a critical weakness. The narrative makes it crystal clear for all to see that the Ad’s creators don’t fully comprehend or truly appreciate the Great American Value of Freedom.
I say this Sir, because if they did, if they had a solid understanding of the true American soul, then the NRA “Freedom’s Safest Place” commercial would remind and assure viewers that we ALL, always, have choices. Most patriots nowadays can easily wise up to the fact that it is morally misleading and potentially treasonous to promote citizen-against-citizen violence as anyone’s last resort.
Perhaps the NRA Ad’s creators have forgotten why our founding fathers worked and fought so hard to build a great and peaceful land, where fine, upstanding citizens could always “let Freedom ring”? Perhaps the NRA marketing objectives have become so dollar-focused that the team intentionally chose to turn a blind eye to one of our most sacred values in a valiant attempt to improve bottom-line results?
Whatever the reason/s might be, how about we both quench our shared thirst for a good ol’ fashioned tussle and remedy this unfortunate situation right away? Don your favorite tough guy boots, Sir, and let’s have ourselves a down and dirty…
“Wayne vs Wayne” Marketing Showdown
Let us imagine ourselves standing face-to-face on a dusty mining town street. Being one of the most feared and revered gunslingers in the West, you are lightning-quick on the draw. The NRA “Freedom’s Safest Place| S2 E2” Ad is your first and only shot. Like I said, it’s a good one. It sends me flying off my feet and leaves a big gaping hole in my now bleeding American heart.
I am going to allow you a few short moments to bask in the glory of that victory. I am going to let some of the whirling dry dust settle around, and on top of, my corpse-like body. I am going to let our googly-eyed audience salute you with the NRA’s “clenched fist of truth” before ya’ll start drifting back towards the ever-welcoming shade of our ramshackle small town saloon…
Then Sir, as unexpectedly as a thief in the night, I am going to use nothing but my own inner strength and my faith in the Almighty God to stand up, take aim, and shoot you right between the eyes.
Expecting death, you are amazed to discover that my bullet has no gunpowder in it whatsoever. As confirmed by the lack of blood on your burning forehead, my shot is instead jam-packed with nothing but the American-made TRUTH of who you and I really are. The truth that, even though seasoned marketers like us might see some things differently, we still both draw strength, inspiration and comfort from the Great American Dream. The truth that well-meaning folks, conservatives and liberals alike, right now risk trampling upon and completely betraying the priceless gift of Freedom.
Please, you must ask your marketing team to contemplate these matters more deeply, Sir. Having closely analyzed some of your organization’s promotion materials over the years I know just how much the NRA and its members care for our country. I admire how much your members respect our great Flag and ALL that it represents. And, I’m also aware that your highly influential organization has everything we need to peacefully put an end to the divisive malady currently wounding our land. The NRA shoulders the responsibility to help drive our great country forward, Sir. But to do that we need to urgently transform the “clenched fist of truth” into the “handshake of RESPECT”.
Mr. LaPierre: Let’s make 100% sure that your marketing team respects every one of our values by remaining true to the story of our great land. Allow me to saddle up with them for a while. I will show them how to confidently guide the thoughts of America towards acceptance, strength and unity. I will always have your back, Sir. I will make sure your noble demonstration of real manly courage and genuine American values does more for the NRA cause and dues-paying membership tally than anything else you’ve ever tried.
Having successfully steered and corralled massive herds for the best in the West, and having earned my stripes in many world-renowned “ranches” abroad, I get along real easy with folks of all levels, from all walks of life. My record as a sharp-shooting wordsmith is second to none. My LinkedIn resume will give you a Grand Canyon view of all the hard work and winning accomplishments I have neatly stacked between the frayed edges of my weapon belt.
I truly hope, Sir, that you prove man enough to accept my “Wayne vs Wayne” marketing challenge. I look forward to us making the mighty NRA once again proudly stand tall, with every hand on every heart, to show America and her many admirers that WE truly are…
“One nation under God, indivisible, with liberty and justice for ALL.”
P.S. Happy Independence Day.